INDOMITABLE SPIRIT CONTINUES

Jeff EllisThere were a multitude of light bulbs that began to light up for me in my head as I continued my martial arts training.  I had found something that I was now taking pride in and on my own without anyone else’s help.  I do not mean my instructors as they played an invaluable part of the equation. Nor do I mean the person who I will always be indebted to for nearly forcefully, almost putting me in the car and making me go to my first lesson, my cousin Mickey.  It was his insight and persistence that created the most influential decision that I ever made that has shaped my life for the better and contributed greatly to the person who I am today.

As many of my friends were taking steps to get ready to apply to colleges I had not done anything but occasionally wonder what I was going to do after graduation –that is if I graduated.

I remember during the summer after graduation there was a lot of buzz about who was doing what in the fall among a group of people that hung out together on those summer nights.

It was now that I needed to make up my mind.  It was not procrastination that placed me in this wait until the last moment kind of situation with what happens next.  It really was up to that point that I could not imagine anything beyond well, maybe I could get some kind of job- doing what?  I definitely did not have any skill outside of the skill of not applying myself.

All that changed with my training in martial arts. It literally helped open my eyes to whom I was and allowed me to actually see that there possibilities out there in the real world waiting for me to explore.

Through my training experience a variety of qualities began to unfold for me and one of those was an unstoppable frame of reference.  A sense of direction came out of no where and despite other people like my guidance counselor at school; my family all said I was not college material.  I still can picture the conversation my mother had with me in the kitchen of our home when she said point blank very sternly “you could never go to college” that summer.

Well, one of those light bulbs flashed on at that moment it was like a big flood light going off in my head.  I don’t believe I said anything out loud to her or anyone else.  Inside a great sense of energy raised up and from that moment I said to myself I am going to do something with myself and I am going to start by going to college… period.

This was a beginning of my first episode of utilizing indomitable spirit in my life.  That force needed to be cultivated and my martial arts helped me with that.  To that end, I relied on indomitable spirit a variety of times while going to college and graduating from a respected private liberal arts college.

Since that memorable experience that impacted my life I have relied on the use of indomitable spirit countless times to push through tough times, challenges, and gaining that extra push or verve required to tackle and accomplish an important goal.

How To Develop Indomitable Spirit

  1. First, by knowing clearly what you believe in and are willing to stand up for these principles. When you look into the mirror see beyond your physical presence. Who and what is the person you are and what is it you represent.  One way to figure this out is to imagine how you want to be thought of by others that you respect that know you.
  2. 2. Next identify one goal or purpose that you feel strongly about. Become fired up inside with an absolute sense of determination to do something about it. It could be a cause or need like doing a food drive to help those less fortunate in your community.

As you accomplish one task that was at first seemingly difficult move on to greater goals and you will see that each time that you successfully overcome the challenges that you are faced with in any situation worthwhile achieving as there are always road blocks, you will be become stronger and that rising spirit will grow, develop and son you will be on your way to overcoming the barriers that stand before you with any endeavor despite their first appearance of being impossible to overcome.

3 Get out of your comfort level.

Everyone likes the feeling of being secure, safe out of harms way.  Certainly the notion of self preservation stands from the beginning of time.  We like feeling safe in our space and comfortable too.

The difficulty for really being able to achieve great levels of success is being able to extend our comfortable boundaries.  You no doubt have heard the phrase get out of your comfort zone.  By pushing yourself and allowing others that support your mission and success beyond what feels just ok or satisfied with you will enjoy substantially higher levels of success and thereby greater satisfaction.

If your dream and passion happens to be helping others imagine by extending yourself just how much more you will be able to achieve and giving others much more.

How to get out of your comfort level:  Challenge yourself with goals

Identify something somewhat easy first.  Now add 10% more to the goal than you originally considered.

Give a time deadline to achieve it.  If it is reading books that are of interest to you or helpful like a motivational books figure how many chapters in the book and set a goal of reading so many pages or chapters a day.

  1. Identify a few key objectives that will fulfill a dream or goal. Consider reaching a little further than you first imagine.  Bounce the idea off a friend or colleague.  If A is possible could B be possible as well and can B bring about greater levels of success.

Join something or participate in something i.e.” running a race, or joining a certain class that will be challenge for you.

 

“The man who goes farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from shore.” ~  Dale Carnegie

See How Jeff Ellis’ International Karate Centers In Strongsville & Avon Lake Can Improve Your Self-Confidence And Belief In Self.  Call Us Today At 440 202-9848.

Jeff Ellis has taught over 10,000 people that include children and adults of all ages in martial arts training.  Beginning as a teenager Jeff’s experience spans more than 50 years with martial arts personally.

Graduated from Baldwin –Wallace University with a major in Psychology.

Currently, a 9th degree Black Belt and a Grandmaster Instructor in Kwanmukan Martial Arts.  Using martial arts as a catapult to overcome difficulties and challenges that caused him to fail repeatedly as a child, Jeff has taken the secrets he has discovered that literally transformed his life to become a successful leader, serial entrepreneur in retail, real estate, event promoter, professional motivational speaker & author.

Jeff is on a mission to spread news to others about how they can learn to become the valuable person they want to be by believing in themselves and developing the right tools to break through the barriers that hold you back

ATTITUDE

ATTITUDE

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude. ~ Thomas Jefferson

How many times growing up did you hear something about attitude.  For me it usually was about my “bad attitude”.  Particularly as a teenager this topic became pretty common place.  Frankly, it was very easy and increasingly easy to place blame upon others or circumstances why tasks did not get done or an assignment / responsibility was poorly completed if at all.

Not taking full responsibility for my actions or consequences of my actions or should I say lack of action was a norm.

This course of direction was largely based upon my attitude.

What I did not realize at the time and am certain that for many people holds true is that my attitude about my life and others was really reflective of how I felt about myself.

Feelings of inadequacy, not measuring up, continually told that I was not good at this or that all played a part.

Once the internal characteristics of my self-image improved I gained a different perspective of my thoughts about who I was and what I did.  It also allowed me a renewed way to look at things and how my attitude affected what my outcome would be, but also the impact of an attitude has on others.

A positive attitude actually gave me strength whereas a negative attitude tore me down and made anything worse.

 What do you expect?

Attitude begins with how you feel about yourself and how you relate to your world around you.

For more years than I would like to say here (over 35) I have been asking the same question to all my students in every class that I teach martial arts to.  After we have finished our warm-ups that include stretches, crunches, push-ups I ask “How’s everyone doing today?”  I get the usual “ok, fine, good”.  I then ask ok whose doing great , raise your hand if you are doing great , what’s better good or great, so whose doing great raise your hand if you’re doing great”  What’s better good or great? Everyone at this point is saying GREAT! Then I say to everyone in class raise your arms and shout “I am GREAT!”

While this is a simple exercise and takes just 1 minute or so it serves as a terrific way to remind children and adults alike that most of the time we have a choice about our attitude.  This starts with what we expect of ourselves.

If we agree that most of the time we do have a choice about our attitude.  In a simplistic way try this exercise.  In our culture it is common place to ask people that we know how‘s it going, how are you doing, etc.  often it’s used as the same as saying hi or hello.   So it is a socially acceptable way of greeting.  Sometimes and maybe more often if you think about it the person that is asking the question may not really care about how we really are doing or would care less about hearing any details.  So, as most people you may say ok, good, getting by, or some variation as a response.  Certainly polite and socially acceptable.

This however is the start of reinforcing and projecting a certain attitude.  You see if you have an expectation of being great, terrific, outstanding, and you are responding with ok, good, getting by thanks, you are bringing yourself down and the message to yourself is inconsistent with what you want from yourself and it is not want you want out of your world right?

When you have a higher expectation of what you want out of life and how you relate to your world you must be consistent throughout.  So knowing that most people will reply with the typical ok, good, etc that reinforces an average ok attitude.  If on the other hand, you are stating I am great, terrific, etc you are reinforcing a much higher level attitude that is very positive.

In addition to lifting you up and reaffirming to all that you have this outstanding attitude you can bet it is lifting to the person asking because remember they like most others are doing ok, fine, getting by thanks.  They will want some of what you got.  In a world of constant mediocrity you are standing out and this lifts everyone around you.

For the next ten times someone asks you “so Jane how’re you doing?” simply smile and state simply “Great, thanks for asking!  You don’t need to jump up and down or anything just put it out there and see the responses from others and visualize what that will do for you too!  It’s lifting for everyone.

You will find that on days that you are not doing so great due to a cold, or perhaps you have something going on like a major deadline on a project that it will raise your attitude up and you’ll feel better than you would otherwise.

The main take away is that in most cases we have a choice about not only how we feel about what is going in our immediate life but also the attitude that we assume in the process.  Both will impact either positively or negatively the response as well as the attitude we carry as a result.

See How Jeff Ellis’ International Karate Centers In Strongsville & Avon Lake Can Improve Your Self-Confidence And Belief In Self.  Call Us Today At 440 238-9390.

Jeff Ellis has taught over 10,000 people that include children and adults of all ages in martial arts training.  Beginning as a teenager Jeff’s experience spans more than 50 years with martial arts personally.

Graduated from Baldwin –Wallace University with a major in Psychology.

Currently, a 9th degree Black Belt and a Grandmaster Instructor in Kwanmukan Martial Arts.  Using martial arts as a catapult to overcome difficulties and challenges that caused him to fail repeatedly as a child, Jeff has taken the secrets he has discovered that literally transformed his life to become a successful leader, serial entrepreneur in retail, real estate, event promoter, professional motivational speaker & author.

Jeff is on a mission to spread news to others about how they can learn to become the valuable person they want to be by believing in themselves and developing the right tools to break through the barriers that hold you back.

 

Another Tip To Overcome Fear Of Failure

Look at the fear as an opportunity

A fear in fact may be a signal that there is something that needs to be addressed.  Facing the fear with a positive attitude may result in advancing yourself toward a major goal or dream that you have.  Stretching yourself often is the best means for self improvement.

 Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking, used to be afraid of public speaking, but now she makes her living by facing that fear and giving talks to thousands of people around the world.

So in the end, your fear may become your best friend when you turn it into something worthwhile thus rewarding to you.

Use these statements of affirmation daily to keep your reality of yourself in check and grow your belief in self.  Repeat theses daily to yourself.  It’s ok to say these out loud.  By doing so they become more powerful.

I will always love, respect, and believe in myself unconditionally

I will achieve whatever I set my mind to

I always find a way to succeed

I am capable of reaching my goal

I am successful and will live life on my terms

I see struggles as opportunities to reach my goals

Keep momentum.  Facing things we fear can be more than a struggle for sure.  There may be possible obstacles including you that get in the way.  Persevere and stay the course, remember the power of change is in your court. Do not by any means let it control you.

By taking on a task that takes you out of your comfort level will automatically raise your belief in self when you complete it no matter how small or trivial it may appear.

“Start a new beginning today and unleash your real potential and believe in who you really are and what you have the power to become.” ~ Jeff Ellis

“ What we believe about ourselves and about life becomes true for us”

You Can Heal Your Life by Louise  L. Hay

See How Jeff Ellis’ International Karate Centers In Strongsville & Avon Lake Can Improve Your Self-Confidence And Belief In Self.  Call Us Today At 440 238-9390.

Jeff Ellis has taught over 10,000 people that include children and adults of all ages in martial arts training.  Beginning as a teenager Jeff’s experience spans more than 50 years with martial arts personally.

Graduated from Baldwin –Wallace University with a major in Psychology.

Currently, a 9th degree Black Belt and a Grandmaster Instructor in Kwanmukan Martial Arts.  Using martial arts as a catapult to overcome difficulties and challenges that caused him to fail repeatedly as a child, Jeff has taken the secrets he has discovered that literally transformed his life to become a successful leader, serial entrepreneur in retail, real estate, event promoter, professional motivational speaker & author.

Jeff is on a mission to spread news to others about how they can learn to become the valuable person they want to be by believing in themselves and developing the right tools to break through the barriers that hold you back.

 

 

Tips To Multiply Your Positive Belief in Self Continue…

Take On Something That You Fear And Overcome It 

This may require small steps initially. The impact on your confidence will be amazing.

The first thing to do with a fear that is holding you back is to address what it is.  Well, you say I already know what it is and I don’t like it so leave me alone right?  Look at it this way, approaching your fear is not much different than that of any objective to accomplish.   You need to know what you are supposed to know, know it well through preparation, study, repetition- if you are say trying to be a better golfer particularly with putting you have to practice.

Write down a little history about the fear. What is it?   When did it start?  What factors led up to the occurrence.  It may be that this seems elementary and what’s the point, however as you go through this exercise you will note that as you are acknowledging this fear that holds you back from moving forward with a dream or goal you are on the road to owning it.  When you take ownership you are coming closer to knowing more clearly about the fear thereby one step closer to overcoming the fear.

For some this may cause some unwanted emotions to surface.  As uncomfortable as it may, be let it come to the surface.

Give your fear a name. 

Define items like when does it occur. Are there certain triggers that set it off?  Are they in your control?

What happens when the fear appears: anxiety, sweaty palms, chest tightens, can’t get out of bed, etc.

Once you have analyzed your fear and have its history and individual components about it including how it impacts you, now start overcoming this fear.

Desensitization. Sometimes it can be as easy as taking small steps toward the fear or touching, feeling the fear in tiny increments.

This happened to me with eating Sushi.  The thought of eating raw fish not only was disgusting but I was afraid I would get some sort of poisoning.  There was no way I was going to go near it let alone eat it.

A friend introduced me to California roll that actually is cooked. That seemed harmless in my eyes. I was  so so about it at first try.  On the second time I was alittle familiar with the taste and I actually enjoyed it.  As time went on I tried cucumber not fish but something different, then tuna, after all what was the big deal about tuna? Right?  So, over some time probably a year or so I began trying other kind of sushi and now really enjoy it.

It may be by taking small steps toward the fear you become more comfortable and come to realize that the fear that seemed outrageous in the beginning is actually no big deal once we really get to know it.

Take it head on  There are circumstances that lend to a direct approach especially if the fear is of immediate threat to you or someone you care about.  If there were a fire in your home and you were on a second floor you may not have a choice but to jump out the window even though you have a fear of heights or fear of falling that stems from a childhood experience falling off your bike.

It may be you have fear of speaking to a superior in your office about an ad deadline as he is intimidating to you or you may have experienced a confrontation in the past.  Your immediate supervisor is expecting a finished piece before days end and requires that you address the task with this person.

What are you going to do? Quit your job? Oh, I did not mention there is no one else than can do this for you.  Looks like the answer is doing it own your own and just do it.  Prepare first by knowing exactly what the task is, identify the goal, what problems or obstacles are there if any, steps to overcome them, and expected outcome.   Write a script, practice saying the script over and over and over again.  List any and all expected and possible responses from this individual and your replies.  Expect the unexpected so be flexible.

When you go to his office your hands may shake, be sweaty but the end result is you will have presented your materials, faced the music and while you may have hated every second of it you handled it and the next time and their will most likely be a next time you will handle yet. May not and probably not enjoy it and in the process create more confidence and raise your self-respect in the process.

See How Jeff Ellis’ International Karate Centers In Strongsville & Avon Lake Can Improve Your Self-Confidence And Belief In Self.  Call Us Today At 440 238-9390.

Jeff Ellis has taught over 10,000 people that include children and adults of all ages in martial arts training.  Beginning as a teenager Jeff’s experience spans more than 50 years with martial arts personally.

Graduated from Baldwin –Wallace University with a major in Psychology.

Currently, a 9th degree Black Belt and a Grandmaster Instructor in Kwanmukan Martial Arts.  Using martial arts as a catapult to overcome difficulties and challenges that caused him to fail repeatedly as a child, Jeff has taken the secrets he has discovered that literally transformed his life to become a successful leader, serial entrepreneur in retail, real estate, event promoter, professional motivational speaker & author.

Jeff is on a mission to spread news to others about how they can learn to become the valuable person they want to be by believing in themselves and developing the right tools to break through the barriers that hold you back.