How many times growing up did you hear something about attitude. For me it usually was about my “bad attitude”. Particularly as a teenager this topic became pretty common place. Frankly, it was very easy and increasingly easy to place blame upon others or circumstances why tasks did not get done or an assignment / responsibility was poorly completed if at all.
Not taking full responsibility for my actions or consequences of my actions or should I say lack of action was a norm.
This course of direction was largely based upon my attitude.
What I did not realize at the time and am certain that for many people holds true is that my attitude about my life and others was really reflective of how I felt about myself.
Feelings of inadequacy, not measuring up, continually told that I was not good at this or that all played a part.
Once the internal characteristics of my self-image improved I gained a different perspective of my thoughts about who I was and what I did. It also allowed me a renewed way to look at things and how my attitude affected what my outcome would be, but also the impact of an attitude has on others.
A positive attitude actually gave me strength whereas a negative attitude tore me down and made anything worse.
What do you expect?
Attitude begins with how you feel about yourself and how you relate to your world around you.
For more years than I would like to say here (over 35) I have been asking the same question to all my students in every class that I teach martial arts to. After we have finished our warm-ups that include stretches, crunches, push-ups I ask “How’s everyone doing today?” I get the usual “ok, fine, good”. I then ask ok whose doing great , raise your hand if you are doing great , what’s better good or great, so whose doing great raise your hand if you’re doing great” What’s better good or great? Everyone at this point is saying GREAT! Then I say to everyone in class raise your arms and shout “I am GREAT!”
While this is a simple exercise and takes just 1 minute or so it serves as a terrific way to remind children and adults alike that most of the time we have a choice about our attitude. This starts with what we expect of ourselves.
If we agree that most of the time we do have a choice about our attitude. In a simplistic way try this exercise. In our culture it is common place to ask people that we know how‘s it going, how are you doing, etc. often it’s used as the same as saying hi or hello. So it is a socially acceptable way of greeting. Sometimes and maybe more often if you think about it the person that is asking the question may not really care about how we really are doing or would care less about hearing any details. So, as most people you may say ok, good, getting by, or some variation as a response. Certainly polite and socially acceptable.
This however is the start of reinforcing and projecting a certain attitude. You see if you have an expectation of being great, terrific, outstanding, and you are responding with ok, good, getting by thanks, you are bringing yourself down and the message to yourself is inconsistent with what you want from yourself and it is not want you want out of your world right?
When you have a higher expectation of what you want out of life and how you relate to your world you must be consistent throughout. So knowing that most people will reply with the typical ok, good, etc that reinforces an average ok attitude. If on the other hand, you are stating I am great, terrific, etc you are reinforcing a much higher level attitude that is very positive.
In addition to lifting you up and reaffirming to all that you have this outstanding attitude you can bet it is lifting to the person asking because remember they like most others are doing ok, fine, getting by thanks. They will want some of what you got. In a world of constant mediocrity you are standing out and this lifts everyone around you.
For the next ten times someone asks you “so Jane how’re you doing?” simply smile and state simply “Great, thanks for asking! You don’t need to jump up and down or anything just put it out there and see the responses from others and visualize what that will do for you too! It’s lifting for everyone.
You will find that on days that you are not doing so great due to a cold, or perhaps you have something going on like a major deadline on a project that it will raise your attitude up and you’ll feel better than you would otherwise.
The main take away is that in most cases we have a choice about not only how we feel about what is going in our immediate life but also the attitude that we assume in the process. Both will impact either positively or negatively the response as well as the attitude we carry as a result.
See How Jeff Ellis’ International Karate Centers In Strongsville & Avon Lake Can Improve Your Self-Confidence And Belief In Self. Call Us Today At 440 238-9390.
Jeff Ellis has taught over 10,000 people that include children and adults of all ages in martial arts training. Beginning as a teenager Jeff’s experience spans more than 50 years with martial arts personally.
Graduated from Baldwin –Wallace University with a major in Psychology.
Currently, a 9th degree Black Belt and a Grandmaster Instructor in Kwanmukan Martial Arts. Using martial arts as a catapult to overcome difficulties and challenges that caused him to fail repeatedly as a child, Jeff has taken the secrets he has discovered that literally transformed his life to become a successful leader, serial entrepreneur in retail, real estate, event promoter, professional motivational speaker & author.
Jeff is on a mission to spread news to others about how they can learn to become the valuable person they want to be by believing in themselves and developing the right tools to break through the barriers that hold you back.